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Love Hate Relationships

Sometimes I love you, sometimes I hate you. But when I hate you, it’s because I love you” (Nat King Cole).

Love and hate are opposites. Right?  They are not.  Who would have thought???
Such songs as well as fictional works describe situations in which people find themselves hating the person they love. This might initially appear to be a contradiction; for how can one love and hate the same person at the same time? Hating the one you love raises difficulties concerning compatibility. It is highly difficult coping with such profound emotional dissonance. How can this be logical?  More importantly, how can the relationship thrive…or even exist?  Take heart; love is broader in scope than is hate, as it refers to more features of the object. (Aharon Ben-Zeʼev, ‎Ruhama Goussinsky, author of The Name of Love in Psychology Today)

.  How about a song of hope?  “Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart, And you’ll never walk alone
You’ll never walk alone, You’ll never walk alone” (Carousel 1956)

This is where Counseling on Demand comes in. You need not go through this alone. Our Lead Online Counselor, Matthew Hunt, has pursued doctoral- level studies in attachment therapy and emotionally focused therapy (EFT) under the tutelage of renowned Dr. Sue Johnson, a student of the notable Dr. Edward John Mostyn Bowlby (British psychologist, psychiatrist, and psychoanalyst).  Matthew has used this knowledge in his 20+ years as a marriage and family therapist, modifying treatment to fit the particular needs of each couple.


Typically, such therapy involves weekly sessions for both partners (together and separately) over a series of, on average, 10-20 sessions. Generally, he helps you as a couple identify communication patterns that are contributing to distress and insecurity in the relationship; helping you to identify your individual patterns as each’s primary problem (and not each other). You both can then begin to develop more positive ways of interacting with each other; creating a secure connection by learning to provide comfort, support, nurturance and care for one another. The relationship then becomes a safe haven where you as partners can turn to one another for love and be both intimate and interdependent with each other. The end goal of attachment-based couples’ therapy is to decrease the level of negative interaction and increase the emotional closeness and connection for you both. (See also, Gail Palmer, MSW, and Alison Lee, PhD., American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy)


With Matthew’s support, you both can get through these stressful times.

And… You needn’t leave your favorite/ place.  Nor must you wait for an appointment.   . You can begin in 24 hours or less.

You may contact him now- 24/7. Your first consultation is free.

He awaits your call, email or text directly (Check out his chat line). If you want a face-to-face, he can Skype you on your computer, cell phone or tablet.

I am the Founder and CEO of Counseling On Demand with a Master's Degree in Marriage and Family Therapy with over 25 years of experience in helping Individuals, Couples, Adolescents, and Families who struggle with a wide variety of Life's Challenges. I thus have developed an Array of Effective Counseling Tools and Evidenced-Based Interventions to help you towards Your Road to Better Mental Health and Wellness. You are Never Alone...I look forward to meeting with you or your family member soon!